By Nabib Aminy

The top news this past week was the “fundamentaly strong economy” faltering even more and the presidential debates which were just like any other presidential debate, filled with rhetoric, hyperboles, castigation and the same BS promises by politicians. Quoting Nikita Khrushchev, “Politicians promise bridges when there are no rivers.” As an informed American, it’s demoralizing that these politicians who have the power and money to make a difference create more problems than what they “fix.” One of the many reasons why sports is interesting and politics is depressing is because there is nothing shady to what you’re watching or any corruption unless you are watching the MLB with steroid infested players, the New England Patriots, or the NBA with its gambling referees. The headlines of the past sports week comprise of the amazin’ Mets failing to make the playoffs, Allan Houston coming back to the Knicks, Brett Favre’s record day against the Cardinals and Sugar Shane Mosley’s fight against Ricardo Mayorga this past Saturday night.

As I predicted in last issue’s article, the Mets choked and will miss the playoffs. My prediction came true when the Mets lost to the Florida Marlins in their final game at Shea Stadium.

Having alcoholic beverages spilled is the ultimate sign of victory
Having alcoholic beverages spilled is the ultimate sign of victory

If Family Feud were to have a question on how the Mets lose, the top answer would most certainly be their bullpen. With the game tied 2-2 at the top of the eighth, former Atlanta Braves first baseman Wes Helms hit a bomb off Scott Schoeneweis. Dan Uggla then hit a homer as well, this one off Luis Ayala, to make it 4-2.Though this game wouldn’t be classified under the embarrassing major league leading thirty blown saves by the Mets bullpen, the pen clearly didn’t do their job again, and it didn’t help that the offense couldn’t hit against Florida’s pitchers. David Wright mirrored Barack Obama’s diplomatic style after the game saying, “We failed. We failed as a team.There’s no pointing fingers. There’s no excuses. We as a unit didn’t get the job done.”Had David Wright followed John McCain’s style, he would have stated, “My friends, my friends, I did my job. The bullpen were terrorists and that’s why we didn’t make the playoffs. We need to get rid of these terrorists or we will always miss the playoffs.” As the Mets experienced “Shea-Ja Vu,” the Brewers are heading to the playoffs after a 26-year hiatus. Such an occasion calls for a champagne celebration best equipped with Michael Phelps swimming goggles, the majority of the Brewers styled.

With both the Yankees and Mets out of the playoffs, the local newspapers are finally going to report on real sports like football, basketball and hockey.Yes, hockey is a sport that is far more athletic and entertaining than baseball. I make this complaint about the newspapers over-posting on baseball because it is disappointing to have reporters post BS articles for seven months about baseball players’ lives.For example, do we have to know how Alex Rodriquez likes men, or how the Mets bullpen watches Déjà Vu before every game. As for the Mets, Yankees and my Braves there is always next year. Though this past year was a disappointment, to say the least, for all these capitalistically talented teams that are all for “orgy spending,” one must commend Larry “Chipper” Jones for winning the National League batting title, hitting .364 for the year.

Moving onto the NFL, Brett Favre had an amazing game as the Jets defeated the Arizona Cardinals. Throwing for a franchise tying record of six touchdowns, and going 24-for-34 for 289 yards and an interception, Brett Favre silenced all the critics and has kept hope alive for Jets fans. His counterpart, Kurt Warner, statistically went bananas throwing 40-of-57 for 472 yards with two touchdowns, though the four turnovers by Warner (two interceptions and two fumbles) were critical in that it led to Jets scoring every time. Had it not been for seven turnovers by the Arizona Canaries, this game would have been far closer because both defenses were pathetic.

Moving on to the entertaining, yet loser loaded, Knicks, another boneheaded move was made by the Knicks’ management in signing 37-year-old veteran, Allan Houston. Absent from the game for a good five years, there is heavy doubt as to whether the move was a wise one; to be more precise, the Knicks need big men that play defense like Marcus Camby or Tyson Chandler. There are also rumors that Stephon Marbury’s contract will be bought out in the upcoming weeks and will be released as a result. It is sad that it has come to this in the Starbury Saga because Stephon gave it his all when he did play. Only time will tell what will happen with Marbury and Houston because the Knicks have seventeen players on the roster and teams are only allowed fifteen at the start of the season.If I were a betting man, Jerome James’ and Marbury’s contracts would be bought out.

The Amazing Mets?
The Mets stay true to their tradition of sucking.

Closing out this week in sports is this past Saturday night’s fight between Sugar Shane Mosley and Ricardo Mayorga, which can be described as humorous. Mayorga’s punching accuracy was horrendous at 12% compared to Mosley at 40%. Mayorga spent more time cheering and pumping his fist than actually punching Sugar Shane. He was also more accurate in hugging Mosley at almost 1000% accuracy. Mosley, on the other hand, was just beating the hell out of Mayorga, and I give credit to Mayorga for being Mosley’s punching bag. The final round was entertaining, with Mosley delivering left jabs and left hooks with Mayorga getting dizzy and what not. Mosley knocked out Mayorga with fifteen seconds left in the final round, and Mayorga got up at about seven seconds left. Then, with one second, left Sugar Shane puts the icing on the cake, getting the second KO with a devastating left hook dead on in the middle of Mayorga’s face.In closing I leave you with a thought, why are the Mets known as the “Amazin’ Mets”?


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