By Evan Goldaper

Thomas Jane reflecting on all his punishing.

If you’re a nerd like me, there’s only one thing that can get you to enter the athletic complex here at Stony Brook, and it obviously isn’t basketball. For the thirtieth year running, I-CON is returning to campus, and I assure you that all of your geeky friends are psyched.

For those of you who remain naïve to the seductive charms of I-CON, it’s Stony Brook’s very own science fiction and fantasy convention. Each year, nerds, geeks, The Stony Brook Press’s Associate Editor Evan Goldaper and the like grab their costumes and prepare for a weekend of geeky excess. Conventions like this usually feature special guests from the industry, and of course I-CON is no exception. The two headliners this year are Julie Benz, who appeared in “Buffy the Vampire Slayer” and plays the mother on TV’s “No Ordinary Family,” and Thomas Jane, from HBO’s “Hung,” in addition to dozens of significantly more minor celebrities ranging from Pokémon’s Brock (insert fanboy squeal here), Cold Spring Harbor Labs, DC’s Answer Man and my next-door neighbor Dan. Side note: Only at I-CON can you have celebrities more minor than Darla from Buffy. But I digress. All of them will be appearing in a variety of panel discussions and signing autographs.

I hope that this year, unlike previous ones, I will be able to build up the courage to tell Brock how impressive he was at voicing Seviper and Croagunk. As a fair warning, if you want to do something similar, like tell Julie Benz how improbable it is that she’d be able to run at super speeds in high-heeled shoes, prepare to wait on very long lines. These are a feature of all conventions, and are best dealt with by bringing a DS and taking advantage of the fact that everyone around you also has a DS.

I-CON also features a massive merchandise floor that’s like the flea market of my dreams, where all guests can purchase such necessities as Super Nintendo games, imported manga, and adorable plushies and is basically thus the place where all of the money I earn all year seems to find itself. There are also smaller events like trivia competitions, a live performance of the Phoenix Wright musical, a masquerade ball and such stage shows as “Cosplay Burlesque.” I have no complete idea of what that last one entails, but their write-up promises “naughty” versions of beloved characters ranging from Tuxedo Mask to Harley Quinn, which personally leaves me scared out of my mind.

If you’re sensing that I-CON is on a much smaller scale than other conventions like Comic-Con, you’re right. Big industry reveals aren’t made here, and you would never expect to see people as famous as Stan Lee or Tim Burton. That doesn’t seem to bother fans on campus, who still seem incredibly excited. Another I-CON expert, Colleen O’Connor, noted that the smaller size allows for it to have a much more intimate feel than its bigger siblings. She added, “I love I-CON. I’ve been going to I-CON for years. It was my first convention, so it’s special to me.”

Indeed, this sense of community is something I-CON loves to stress, and it is common for students to return many times. This year’s will be my fifth consecutive I-CON, which makes me feel old, but still excited. Other students will be making their first appearance at I-CON this year. One of our staffers here at The Stony Brook Press, Sarah Evins, said that “I’ve never been to a convention before, so I’m excited to be inducted into a whole new level of geekdom, I guess.”

It may not be full of prestige, but if you’re reading this issue, I-CON is probably the closest convention to you. Tickets are in the form of membership, which is on sale online or at the campus bookstore. Students do get a discount, so you have no excuse to not go. I, of course, suggest that you do. Look for me: I’ll be the one with all the humorous pins.