Flava Flav’s Fried Chicken Future on Long Island

Flava Flav, the hip-hop-icon-turned-chef who draws culinary inspiration from masturbatory practices, has a lofty goal for his future—to open a fried chicken restaurant on his native Long Island.

Flava Flav made an appearance on Jimmy Kimmel Live Wednesday night to discuss his new fried chicken restaurant and to demonstrate his cooking skills. He wore a red chef’s uniform complete with a black and gold clock around his neck

His restaurant, located in Clinton, Iowa, bears his name and is located next to a KFC.

While his competitors boast a secret blend of 11 herbs and spices, Mr. Flav seasons his chicken with ‘Flava Flav Crystals,’ which he brought onto the show in a large Ziploc bag.

The only ingredient in the crystals, according to Flava Flav, is himself. Kimmel suspects that it also contains salt and pepper.

The demonstration gave Flava Flav an opportunity to give Kimmel a disturbing cooking tip. When seasoning a piece of chicken, rub the spices in hard and thoroughly, “like the meat is your own.”

Kimmel then asked how the restaurant is doing. Apparently it’s doing quite well, with lines out the door and tourists coming from afar. That could mean more restaurants. “Next thing I’m gonna do is open up a place at my home, Long Island” Flava Flav said.

In fact, when Flava Flav is unable to stop himself from consuming slightly more illegal crystals, he spends his time at LICR, a rehab facility just a few miles away from Stony Brook’s Southampton campus.

Some time in the future, Flava Flav’s Chicken could be just a bus ride away!